eight hour pass

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My youngest has made his rank. This should be a good thing,right?
He was offered the canine program if he made his rank. They increased his sanction limit to 20 so he had a chance. I talked to him on Tuesday and he was telling my how he was going to rank and get 30 sanctions by Saturday. He ranked up on Thursday morning and immediately received six sanctions. I told his case manager what he told me. Her response was:” He is deliberately getting sanctions! He is doing this on purpose!”
Ya think??
Tomorrow he will be home for eight hours. Tomorrow is also his siblings tournament. We will have several hours in a nearby city paying attention to children who are not youngest. Last year this precipitated the infamous cleaver incident. My next younger son sparred while I was being bitten,screamed at and having my breast twisted in the bleacher. I do not want a repeat this year.
My husband will be with us this time. If youngest even hints he may melt down,my husband will drive him back to the Academy. I shouldn’t be worried.
I am.
My attitude is not the best toward him right now. I need to get my head back where it should be. At the least I need to keep my feelings buried far beneath the surface. I do not want my son to feel my ambivalence towards him. I want him to want to be with us-just a little bit.
If you think about it,say a few prayers for us tomorrow,especially for me. Pray I can be the mother he needs. Pray the other kids can have a few moments in the limelight. They have given a lot of themselves this past year. It would be nice for them to have a few moments in the sun.


About lenell

Wife to a very patient man and mom to 8 interesting kids via birth,marriage and adoption. Grandma to nearly 5,nearly perfect grandchildren.
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2 Responses to eight hour pass

  1. Bethany says:

    I’m praying your other kids have an awesome day and that your youngest won’t cause any problems.

  2. hnracademy says:


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